Blergh. Doughnuts made with artificial sweetener: why would you do that to me, Greggs? If I wanted diet food, I wouldn't be buying doughnuts. And why was there no warning? "This will taste disgusting, don't buy it, it won't satisfy your doughnut craving at all, and the flavour will hang around all day."

Peh, peh, peh, peh, peh.

---

I am not the only one, I'm sure, whose criteria for buying a new fleece top goes something like this:

- Not the same colour as the one I've got
- Not too expensive, it's only to wear on the journey to work or around the house
- Pockets
- ...Ooh, that one will make me look like a Muppet!

It's purple, and it's FLUFFY!