Title: With Great Power
Author: Pepper
Rating: G
Featured character(s): Daniel, Jack
Summary: Arrrrrrrrr.
A/N: Seeing as Jenn was one of the people who voted 'Pirates! Ooh, goody!', and it's her apocaficathon for which I'm horribly late, I feel less guilty about this. Anyhow, it's just a snippet, for Talk Like A Pirate Day.

ETA: I should've linked to these earlier, but anyhow. This is the third in a series, starting with Pirating 101, and continuing with Reasons To Be Cheerful.

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"Cappuccino with an extra shot," said Daniel, glancing up from the book in his hand. Didn't commissary staff usually wear those little white hats? Not that there was anything wrong with a red bandana...

"Aye-aye."

He took his coffee, grabbed a plate and a Danish, and went to pay.

"That be one doubloon fifty," said the commissary worker manning the till. Daniel looked up, wondering if he was hearing things. "One dollar fifty," she said, a little more slowly.

He handed over the money, took his change, and juggled the coffee and Danish as he grabbed a couple of napkins. As he made his way to a free table, he distinctly heard her mumble, "Arrrr."

Odd. Very odd.

"...asked the lubber, 'Is that a hornpipe in your britches, or are you..."

Daniel let the chattering airmen pass, and sat down at the table in the corner, dipping his nose back into his book and metaphorically pulling the duvet of obliviousness back over his head.

He emerged, blinking, some time later, to find the commissary mostly empty, and Jack sitting opposite him, eating cake.

"Ahoy," said Jack, licking icing off his fork.

Daniel absent-mindedly took a sip of coffee, realising a moment too late how cold it was going to be. But it was hot, so either a freak miracle had occurred and kept his coffee hot, or Jack had brought him a new cup and swapped it when he wasn't paying attention. "Ahoy?" Something clicked in his brain, at last, as the caffeine hit. "Oh, god, it's not-"

"Aye, 'deed it is," said Jack, attempting to dip a forkful of cake into his coffee. The cake, too absorbent to retain structural integrity, immediately disintegrated and fell off. "Arr," said Jack, regretfully, and peered down into the cup. Daniel frowned at him.

"Have you seen Sam or Teal'c?" he asked, instinctively calling for backup.

Jack gave him an odd look, and then dropped his gaze to the used plates that sat either side of Daniel. "Yarr," he said. "That be some good literature, huh?"

"Um, yes - I mean, aye." Daniel's eye was caught by the red bandanna of the kitchen guy again, and a dreadful thought struck him. "Jack... You didn't. Tell me you didn't."

Jack blinked innocently at him. "Shipmate?"

"Jack-" Daniel cut himself off, stood up abruptly, and strode across to the notice board that was attached to the wall next to the commissary door. "JACK!" He flailed his hands in the air as he walked back. "You're a general now!"

Jack put down his fork and leaned back with a sigh, linking his hands across his stomach. "Aye. So?"

"So you've got to act maturely! Like a grown-up! Heading the SGC is a responsibility, not a – a game! You can't use your powers to institute Talk Like A Pirate Day across the whole base! And say that anyone who doesn't comply will be made to walk the plank into a wormhole! It's not – it's – you can't DO that!"

Jack grinned - a broad, lazy grin, that would have gone perfectly with a parrot and an eyepatch. "Whatever I want, Daniel," he said. "Whatever I want."

Daniel clapped a hand over his eyes and groaned. He was never going to live that remark down. Never.

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ARRRRR.